I relate a lot to what you wrote here. I was into fandom heavily in the 2000-2014 age, then took an extended break. Coming back is hard! It's so different and hard to connect now.

Or maybe I'm doing it wrong.

But, yes. I'm also into self-indulgent, because life is a dumpster fire right now for a lot of people and why *not* enjoy something fun and indulgent?